A New Year Has Begun

I might have to wait, I'll never give up. I guess its half timin' and the other halfs luck. Wherever you are, whenever its right, you'll come out of nowhere and into my life. And I know that we can be so amazing. And baby your love is gonna change me. And now I can see every possibility.

So, my birthday came and it went. I spent some time with good friends to start off the new year and it was perfect. I couldn't have asked for better company. Jessica, Richard, William and Brentonio were the perfect group of people to begin 2010! It helped me realize a lot of things too.

Realization #1: I am finding myself again. The real me. And the real me is OK! In fact, the real me is pretty stinking awesome! When I'm always worrying about a relationship, I loose myself. I don't want to loose myself anymore. God is helping me with that. Good thing he always knows the real me, even when I hide under all that stuff!

Realization #2: I don't need everyone else's approval! Its as simple as that, no explanation needed.

Realization #3: I'm going to live out my dreams, God hasn't told me the plans yet... but I'm gonna go along with my dreams assuming I'm aligned with what he wants for me in my life. If I stray off the path, he'll let me know.

Realization #4: People will let me down and I will let people down.

Realization #5: I am not now, nor will I ever be, perfect! I will strive and God will see me through Jesus which makes me perfect. End of story.

Last, Realization #6: I'm getting out of Arkansas in the next five years. I will stay here as long as it takes to get certain loans forgiven, then I'm headed west or north. God hasn't let me know for sure yet, so I keep my options open.

God has so many incredible things planned for me and I couldn't be more excited about all of it. 2010 is going to bring a whole lot of new things. I'm finally settling in Searcy in an apartment in May which is so very exciting. I get to work at the Media Center this summer, which is an answer to prayer! My life is pretty clearly blessed right now, I love it.

--Take it easy,
--In Christ,
~Marisa Lynn

An Ending... A broken heart... A beginning... A new heart

On a lighter note, I'm returning the Little Rock very soon. Maybe as soon as tomorrow. But New Years Day at the absolute latest. I'm so ready to settle down in an apartment in Searcy, in May. I need to! With the turn of events recently, I wouldn't be surprised if I end up in Colorado a lot sooner than I might have thought! That is an exciting thought, the thought that for now, I really can make my own decisions without thinking about any other person that will have to get a job and be happy somewhere. Shoot, I might re-think Colorado for now and head to St. Louis... it has always been my first love. haha! I have a lot to ponder and a new year which means a new beginning just around the corner. I think that God is preparing me for something. Just waiting to see what that something is! I can't wait, despite the fact that my heart lie in pieces, He has ALL the pieces and knows how to put them right back together. Thank you, Jesus

-In Christ,
~Marisa

I wish I had your strength.

I know that this is partly the major lack of sleep speaking, however, I wish I was a part of your life. Its funny that I want this, I am honestly not even sure why. You have always intrigued me, always drawn me in. Now, in the times that you are usually there, even if for only those three times a year, you are not there. Its interesting, but now you're really happy and you don't want to mess that up, I can certainly understand that. Hmmm. oh to be so happy. Don't get me wrong, I am happy. But as happy as you?

...

A question I know the answer to.

*smiles*
God, take my life...

Its yours.

-Marisa Lynn

I survived you

I see the picture clear now, the fog has lifted.
The wool you tried to pull over my eyes was clever.
Yeah you're gifted.
But you forgot to dot some I's, and cross some T's along the way.
I'm better now despite you baby.
I'm stronger these days.
Stronger.


I survived the crash.
Survived the burn.
Survived the worst, yeah baby, but I learned.
Survived the lies.
Survived the blues.
Almost killed me, but I survived the truth.
And when you wrote me off like I was doomed.
I survived you.

I can look in the mirror now.
It's been a slow awakening.
Haunted by a heart full of you, couldn't help mistaking.
That you could ever care for anyone.
Anyone but yourself. Hey.
But you would have to have a conscience baby.
Good luck I wish you well.


I survived the crash.
Survived the burn.
Survived the worst, yeah baby, but I learned.
Survived the lies.
Survived the blues.
Almost killed me, but I survived the truth.
And when you wrote me off like I was doomed.
I survived you.

This heart has been torn in two.
Cut and bruised.
With too many bitter endings.
I'll be damned if I have thoughts of you
Rain on my new beginning.

I survived the crash.
Survived the burn.
Survived the worst, yeah baby, but I learned.
Survived the lies.
Survived the blues.
Almost killed me, but I survived the truth.
And when you wrote me off like I was doomed.

I survived the crash.
Survived the burn.
Survived the worst, yeah baby, but I learned.
Survived the lies.
Survived the blues.
Almost killed me, but I survived the truth.
And when you wrote me off like I was doomed.
I survived you.

IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?

So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend your cool...

Opening Credits:
True Love's Kiss-- Enchanted Soundtrack

Waking Up:
Downhill from here-- Snow Patrol

First Day At School:
Picture to burn-- Taylor Swift

Falling In Love:
I just called to say I love you-- Leonel Ritchie

Fight Song:
Staple it Together-- Jack Johnson

Breaking Up:
Fallin'-- Braddigan

Prom:
When God made you-- Natalie Grant & Newsong

Life:
Some days you gotta dance-- Dixie Chicks

Mental Breakdown:
Overdue-- The Get up Kids

Driving:
Fall-- Nicole C. Mullen

Flashback:
Long As I Can See The Night-- CCR

Wedding:
Teardrop-- Portishead & Massive Attack

Birth of Child:
Camilo-- State Radio

Final Battle:
Unkown Soldier-- Breaking Benjamin

Death Scene:
Come-- Goo Goo Dolls

Funeral Song:
This Kiss-- Faith hill

End Credit:
Crank that Soldier Boy-- Soulja Boy ft. Twista

HAHA!! i like this!

Give a little Bit

I know that it has been a while since I posted, so i'm going to do a little bit before I settle down and go to sleep. I'm used to being asleep by now and its only ten. Geez! Anyhow, went home this weekend and got some things taken care of. Had to get the car tagged and stuff. Nothing too exciting. Got to talk to Allison a couple of times which is always nice. Haven't talked to Brian in a week or so, so this week we will probably have a nice long talk some time. Hopefully. I've been trying to get with Brittany for the past three weeks but the two of us are always so busy it seems almost impossible, so we'll keep trying.
I'm hoping to secure a job this week at Cato. Its a clothing store. I love the store, its probably my favorite place to shop, so I'm hoping that this week I'll hear from Charlotte! I keep praying that this will work out.
Need to get to the gym soon, start a routine. Once again, keep praying. I'll throw up a picture, haven't had my camera working in a while because the batteries have been dead and every time I go to wal-mart i forget that I need batteries. This weekend I remember. Score
Have a fantastic week guys! Love you!
-in Christ,
~Marisa

A Photo Montage

I miss all of these people SO much!